02 January 2018

Proofs

I've (thank God) been able to tap the brakes on my voracious consumption of theology and general Orthodox stuff. In part this is because I'm maxed out, at capacity, able to take in no more and need to give my brain time to digest (to continue with ingestion analogies). I've actually been chilling out, playing more games, watching more stuff, not pushing things too hard.

I'm also slowing down because I'm getting tired of arguments. Most of the stuff I read online is just debates between Protestants and Orthodox and Catholics. Everybody has a proof and everyone wants to share it. The thing is, we don't change until we're ready to, no matter what we take in. And we don't often realize we're ready. So a lot of these proofs I read are from people who were ready, had some kind of experience, and are communicating it in opposition to something else. While these things are interesting, they'll ping off your brain unless you are ready too. The response is then to ignore it or, if you're the type of person who loves to argue and be correct, to attack it.

I am not that type of person, and in these discussions soon saturate and retire to my corner.  I don't want PVP any more -- I want solo and co-op. In short, I'm tired of proofs. I'm tired of talking about this stuff. I want something to do. I want Christ. I'm ready for the next thing.

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